Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario
|Journal||Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies|
|Title||Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario|
|Author(s)||Muhammad, Maunde Usman, Salihu Mohammed Bara, Usman Muhammad Sani|
|Keywords||Divorce, Economics, Muslims, Socio|
|Chicago 16th||Muhammad, Maunde Usman, Salihu Mohammed Bara, Usman Muhammad Sani. "Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario." Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies 6, no. 2 (2019).|
|APA 6th||Muhammad, M. U., Bara, S. M., Sani, U. M. (2019). Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario. Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies, 6(2).|
|MHRA||Muhammad, Maunde Usman, Salihu Mohammed Bara, Usman Muhammad Sani. 2019. 'Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario', Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies, 6.|
|MLA||Muhammad, Maunde Usman, Salihu Mohammed Bara, Usman Muhammad Sani. "Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario." Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies 6.2 (2019). Print.|
|Harvard||MUHAMMAD, M. U., BARA, S. M., SANI, U. M. 2019. Socio-Economic Effects of Rampant Divorce in Nigeria: The Northern Muslims Scenario. Bannu University Research Journal in Islamic Studies, 6.|
Divorce seems to be more socially accepted nowadays and it is the most won issue in the modern world. Divorce in the family always signals dangers and insecurity in the society. Findings have indicated that divorce has negative impact on spouses as well as the development of children in the society, and it leads to number of social problems such as prostitution by young ladies. It will be difficult for a woman to cater for all the basic needs of the child single handedly. It will grow up demoralized. He suffers different types of deprivations including parental love, care and affection. Such children grow up humiliated and heartless. They resort to various crimes such as robbery, rope, arson and other related wrong doings. It is also observed that, divorce has a negative impact on man too, men cannot really make their feelings vocal. The stress involved in the divorce can cause lack of sleep, depression, fatigue and listlessness; a divorce can have numerous psychological implications as well. The methodological approach used in this paper is descriptive, prescriptive and annalistic; meanwhile the method of data collection is historical and empirical.
Marriage can be referred to as the legal union of a couple as husband and wife or a legally accepted relationship between a woman and a man in which they live as husband and wife, or the official ceremony which results in this divorce on the other hand refers to the legal dissolution of marriage. In Islam there can be no divorce without a valid marriage, thus for a divorce to occur there must be a marital relationship recognized by Shari’ah between the parties. There are different Islamic terminologies for the different method that may be adopted in dissolving marriage. In other words, when the court imposes separation on the unwilling party to divorce it is called talīqul qāḍi, where the couple mutually agree to dissolve the marriage it is called Mubarāt. Ṭalāq refers to dissolution at the instance of the husband while Khul‛a refers to dissolution of marriage at the instance of the wife or third party who offers to pay a ransom in kind or cash to free the woman from the bond of marriage. Li‛ān Occurs where the husband takes oath and refrains from having affairs with his wife for more than four months while Ẓihār occurs when the husband equates the wife tosomeone unlawful to him for marriage (Mahram) such as his sister, mother, foster mother.
The effect of marriage dissolution, Couples facing a marriage break-up will have to cope with some of the following: Anxiety, Anger, Sadness, Weariness, Guilt, Low self-esteem, Worry, Frustration/Disappointment, Loneliness, distrust etc. Among estranged partners, these feelings are unavoidably present before, during and after the divorce and if not checked could lead to hatred, commission of crime, psychological disorders and other complications. Sometimes in a bid suppress these feelings or to spite at the divorced spouse a spouse may rush into another marriage which may suffer similar fate as the previous marriage.
Divorced couple may also suffer social stigma which may be inevitable, for example, it is not unusual for divorces to be derided by community, friends and relatives will ask awkward questions, the estranged couple will lose each other’s relatives and friends, the help of relatives, welfare and other organizations to look after the children may have to be sought. Due to low self-esteem and loneliness, there is the likelihood for the woman to be sexually assaulted.1
A divorced husband or wife may be saddled with added responsibilities and roles, particularly with regard to care of the children; he or she has to be both father and mother to the children. Some mothers may even have to go out and work to maintain their children while those working may have to find another job so as get better income to maintain the children.
On the consequences of divorce Babalola and others has this to say, in every divorce, the children are likely to be affected psychologically most. They are the victims of the differences of their parents. This is because at tender age, children are very sensitive and good observers. Basically, divorce tends to intensify the child's dependence and it tends to accelerate the adolescent's independence; it often elicits a more regressive response in the child and a more aggressive response in the adolescent.2
Due to divorce and its associated problems, divorced couples may think more of their own feelings while disregarding their children’s feeling, thus making the children feel unwanted and if this is not corrected, they may develop a negative attitude towards their parents and marriage.
Review of Literature
An effort has been made by a researcher to study and review some literature which is related to the topic under study.
On a survey carry out by Ghyayyur (2010), on the causes of marriage dissolution, she discovered that, Incompatibility was the most cited reason for divorce, followed by abuse, financial disputes, family in-laws’ interference, sexual infidelity / adultery and others. While I. Doi (1999), analyzed that, every warring couple could cite multiple reasons for the break up, there is always one major factor that leads to the death of a marriage. Some of these factors are detectable and even preventable before the marriage. Compatibility or lack thereof between potential spouses can be determined with good scrutiny prior to official union. On the side of Abdullahi (2001), he argued that ‘incompatibility’ is also a convenient excuse or scapegoat some couples use to end their marriage due to relatively minor lifestyle inconveniences they go through after marriage. According to Fatai (2008), he also stressed that, understandably, more women than men ranked financial abuse, physical abuse, and spiritual abuse as a higher form of abuse they experienced in the marriage. While Aisha (1999), on her side she ascertains that, on the emotional abuse of marriage on verbal abuse, the most common forms of abuse are also perhaps the most dangerous because they are often not as overt and explicit as other types of abuse. A spouse may continue to silently suffer under emotional and verbal abuse from his wife for years until one day it becomes intolerable. While on the effect of marriage dissolution, Babalola (2002), in his write-up assert that, Couples facing a marriage break-up will have to cope with some of the following: Anxiety, Anger, Sadness, Weariness, Guilt, Low self-esteem, Worry, Frustration/Disappointment, Loneliness, distrust etc. Among estranged partners, these feelings are unavoidably present before, during and after the divorce and if not checked could lead to hatred, commission of crime, psychological disorders and other complications. Sometimes in a bid suppress these feelings or to spite at the divorced spouse a spouse may rush into another marriage which may suffer similar fate as the previous marriage. According to Umar (1997), Divorced couple may suffer social stigma which may be inevitable, for example, it is not unusual for divorces to be derided by community, friends and relatives will ask awkward questions, the estranged couple will lose each other’s relatives and friends, the help of relatives, welfare and other organizations to look after the children may have to be sought. Due to low self-esteem and loneliness, there is the likelihood for the woman to be sexually assaulted.
Consequently, Muhammad (2005), argued that a divorced husband or wife may be saddled with added responsibilities and roles, particularly with regard to care of the children; he or she has to be both father and mother to the children. Some mothers may even have to go out and work to maintain their children while those working may have to find another job so as get better income to maintain the children. On a survey carry out by Babalola and others (2004), has this to say, in every divorce, the children are likely to be affected psychologically most. They are the victims of the differences of their parents. This is because at tender age, children are very sensitive and good observers. Divorce introduces a massive change into the life of a boy or girl no matter what the age. Witnessing loss of love between parents, having parents break their marriage commitment, adjusting to going back and forth between two different households, and the daily absence of one parent while living with the other, all create a challenging new family circumstance in which to live. In the personal history of the boy or girl, parental divorce is a watershed event. Life that follows is significantly changed from how life was before. Somewhat different responses to this painful turn of events occur if the boy or girl is still in childhood (up through about age 8 or 9) or has entered adolescence (beginning around ages 9 - 13). Basically, divorce tends to intensify the child's dependence and it tends to accelerate the adolescent's independence; it often elicits a more regressive response in the child and a more aggressive response in the adolescent. Usman (2000), argued that, due to divorce and its associated problems, divorced couples may think more of their own feelings while disregarding their children’s feeling, thus making the children feel unwanted and if this is not corrected, they may develop a negative attitude towards their parents and marriage.
Causes of Divorce Among Muslim Married Couples
Strong union of the husband and wife is necessary condition for a happy family life. Islam therefore, insists upon the subsistence of a marriage and prescribes that breach of marriage contract should be avoided. Initially no marriage contended to be a life-long partnership wherein both partners find security and happiness and are able to establish a family and bring up their children. However, if a marriage runs into problems, and one or both of the partners want to separate, sometimes these problems are not solved and the marriage ends in divorce.
Based on the research conducted on the causes of divorce among married Muslim couples in northern Nigeria the following observations were made on the immediate and remote causes of divorce.3
It is observed some families; due to poverty give away their female
children in order to make money. Parents who cannot afford to train their female
children give them out for marriage so that it could fetch them money. They don’t care what the child feels or wants for herself. They force her into unwanted or unplanned marital life. However, such couple would opt for a divorce by the time they realize that the union is against their wishes.4
It has been observed that people in Northern Nigeria give out their daughters to whoever they desire in order to strengthen the bond of friendship with another man without consent of the daughter i.e. (compulsory marriage) which at the end resort to divorce.5
Further studies carried out indicated that a stumbling block to a successful marriage life is when the marriage is not organized based on the mutual understanding for both parties, for example, if one of the couples is compelled to accepting the marriage either by parents or other means, this tends to manifest in their day-to-day living and finally leads to separation.6
Another observation made is that some people use their power of authority and cultural values (babarism) to arrange such force marriage and they hide behind the religion of Islam to justify their actions. The research work learned that Islam forbids compulsory marriages. In Islam for a marriage to be valid there has to be mutual consent from both parties. Allah (S.W.T) mentioned in the Qur’an that:
O you who belief! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will, and you should not treat them with harshness, that you may take away part of the Mahr you have given them, unless they commit open illegal sexual intercourse. And live with them honorably. If you dislike a thing and Allah brings through it great deal of good. (Qur’an 4:19)
Also the Prophet (S.A.W) said a matron should not be given marriage except after consulting her, and virgin should not be given in marriage except with her permission (Tirmizi)
Unfaithfulness of Married Couples to Each Other
Unfaithfulness to each other is among the most common reason for divorce. The extent to which unfaithfulness among couples can cause disharmony in the home is made clear by the following study. Most couples who are of good conduct and have fear of Allah (S.W.T) cannot be tempted with money to succumb to, adultery.7
Also some women do not make themselves attractive to their husbands anymore after many years of marriage, focusing all their attention on childbearing and rearing. Lack of tolerance between the couples makes them dissatisfied with each other and hence brings lower sexual urge that may lead to divorce.8
In another observation, employed woman who are secretaries or others to the supervisors in their respective places of work may be attracted to these superiors and consequently have extra marital affairs with them. This may lead to separation in the event of having knowledge of this by their husbands.9
There are people who do not have any time for their wives because of their over
commitments or their reasons. They leave their wives thirsty for sex and this may lead them to have extra marital affairs with others.10
In another observation emerging trend in the case of divorce by extra marital affairs is the role of internet in general as well as social networking and dating sites in particular. The internet has added a new dimension to extramarital affairs in recent times. The anonymity and easy availability of online dating now results in many spouses looking for love outside marriage and once a woman is caught in an unlawful affair it leads automatically to divorce. The above work is relevant to the topic but it lacks quotations from the Glorious Qur’an and prophetic traditions and the researcher want to fill the gap. It is mentioned in the Qur’an that Allah (S.W.T).11
Verily, those who like that (the crime of) illegal sexual intercourse should be propagated among those who believe, they will have a painful torment in this world and in the hereafter. And Allah knows and you know not (Qur’an 24:19)
It is illegal to satisfy sexual desire outside marriage as for as Islam is concerned it is mention in the Qur’an that and come not near to unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily, it is a fahishah (i.e anything that transgresses its limits (a great sin) …… (Qur’an 17:32)
In another verses Allah (S.W.T) says, the regulations of hijab for women must be followed. He says:
And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual intercourse) (Qur’an 24:31).
Incapacity of the Husband to Shoulder Full Responsibility of His Wife
It is also observed that a poor maintenance of wife, where a man neglects his responsibilities of his wife is contributing factor that leads to divorce. According to some respondent the neglected wife may decide to quit and re-marry instead of being subjected to emotional and economic torture. Similarly, observation reveals that there is a relationship between income and marital breakdown and it says low income earning places strain on marriage especially on the husband who failed to live up to his expectation as a father, husband and bread winner of the family.12
The observation also found the report made by National Mirror Correspondent. On the case of dissolution of marriage filled by Hajiya Aisha Mijinyawa which was brought before the Sharia Court. Afolahan Square Jalingo, she told the correspondent that she brought a petition for dissolution of her marriage to Alhaji Bello Makama on the ground for non-affection and inability of her former husband to live up to his responsibility relating to her care and her children’s care. She said due to these, she was compelled to seek the dissolution of the marriage.13
From the above work we learned that in-capacity of the husband to shoulder full responsibility to his wife is one of the factors. It is obligatory in Islam for husband to maintain his wife, and if he fails to do so, the wife may seek divorce on this ground.
The scholars of Islam have agreed that it is obligatory for husbands to spend on their wives, on the condition that the wife makes herself available to her husband. If she rebels, then she is not entitled to that spending as mentioned in the Qur’an:
But the father of the child should bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis…..(Qur’an 2:233)
In another verses Allah (S.W.T) said:
Let the rich man spends according to his means; and the man whose resources are restricted, let him spend according to what Allah has given him (Qur’an 65:7)
From the Sunnah: the prophet (S.AW) said to Hind bint ‛Utbah the wife of Abu Sufyān who had complained that he did not spend on hers and the Prophet (S.A.W) said to her that: Take what is sufficient for you and your children on a reasonable basis.14
Absence of Sexual Satisfaction by the Husband
Another observation made is that absence of sexual satisfaction by the husband may lead to divorce. Islam permits the wife to be divorced from her husband upon request if the husband is impotent and cannot perform his marital duties, or if he chooses not to have sexual intercourse with his wife and fulfill her need, or if he contract a terminal illness after marriage, or he contacts syphilis or any other venereal diseases that may harm the wife, or at least, make her loose her desire to be with that man. In a similar study, it is suggesting that faskh brings and end of marriage it will be decreed by the Qāḍi (Judge) after the careful consideration of an application made on him by the wife. The Qāḍi if satisfied that the women are prejudiced by a marriage, he will annul the marriage, because sexual defect in one of the spouses is among the conditions governing Ṭalāq and faskh under the Islamic law. 15
A further study carried out shows that marriage will be successful to the extent if the husband and wife are mutually satisfied and both are able to fulfill their sexual gratification. Marriage is annulled when coitus is physically impotence and there is no hope for a medical or surgical solution. In the cases of male importance, a grace period of one year is allowed while treatment is being sought. After that the marriage has to be annulled because it can no longer, fulfill the fundamental purpose of protecting chastity of both partner’s sexual relations are therefore one of the obligations of marriage, and their prolonged refusal without reasonable causes is recognized ground for divorce by either partner. 16
Influence of Parents in the Lives of their Children
Another discovery made is that, parents who interfere into their children’s lives that finally put the couples in confusion as to who to listen to when the ideas contradict one another jeopardizes the marriage. It is more common if from the beginning parents were not comfortable with the marriage. Similarly, when the parents discovered that a man has entire love, care and concern to his wife, as she deserves, his parents interpret that to mean he is abandoning them and they grow jealous and they threat their son has been charmed. This phenomenon is more common with problematic mothers who live with their sons. Observation also revealed that the greatest single factor that causes quick divorce among Muslims is in-law’s interference by both side. Many investigations stated that parents are not only intervening into their sons’ marriages affairs by insulting the daughter’s in-law, but they also can instruct their sons to leave their wives i.e. divorce them.17
Some Consequences of Divorce on the Children
These behaviors may include misbehaving to the parents, disrespecting them, hating them, not listening to them or taking their advice, disliking and haven distrust for the opposite sex etc.18
Disregard for the parents will not allow for the proper training of the children but rather will lead to development of poor perspective of life. While some children may marry early due to loneliness and eagerness to be free from parental control, some other children may detest marriage and take up promiscuity in its stead.19
In a study published in the March 2013 edition of Public Health, researchers at the University of Toronto found that both sons and daughters of divorced families are significantly more likely to begin smoking than peers whose parents are married. In an analysis of 19,000 Americans, men whose parents divorced before they turned 18 had 48 percent higher odds of smoking than men with intact families. Women had 39 percent higher odds of picking up the habit.20
An Increased likelihood of Dropping out of School
A 2010 study found that more than 78 percent of children in two-parent households graduated from high school by the age of 20. However, only 60 percent of those who went through a big family change — including divorce, death, or remarriage — graduated in the same amount of time. The younger a child is during the divorce, the more he or she may be affected. Also, the more change children are forced to go through, like a divorce followed by a remarriage, the more difficulty they may have finishing school.21
A Propensity for Crime
In 2009, the law firm Mishcon de Reya polled 2,000 people who had experienced divorce as a child in the preceding 20 years. And the results did not paint a positive picture of their experiences. The subjects reported witnessing aggression (42 percent), were forced to comfort an upset parent (49 percent), and had to lie for one or the other (24 percent). The outcome was one in 10 turned to crime, and 8 percent considered suicide.22
In addition to these, children could suffer the following:
(i) Sense of being deprived of parental love
(ii) Separation from siblings
(iii) Sense of guilt, embarrassment, insecurity and loss of self confidence
(vi) Loss of concentration in studies.23
Problems and Effects on the Society
Divorce encourages violence, this is because upon divorce, the relationship between the families of the divorced couple may turn sour, leading to hatred and mistrust between them and thus they tend to be aggressive to each other and may not hesitate to unleash their vengeance even on very trivial issues. 24
Divorce encourages disunity in the society, this is so where the couples are from different tribes (inter-tribal marriage) and where such marriage was dissolved due to irreconcilable dispute. Each family point accusing finger at the other family for breaking the marriage and they adopt the inductive reasoning by using the marriage of their child to another tribe as a general authority for marriage to that tribe. They discourage not only their family but any person who cares to listen from marrying from such tribe.25
Sexual assault and Child abuse
Where either of the spouses after divorce fails to shoulder his or her responsibility (most especially the man), the children might not be catered for therefore exposing them to abuses while striving to make a living. For instance, where the maintenance of the children is left solely on the mother who has little income, the children might have to start fending for themselves at a very tender age. They may be trafficked, sexually assaulted, forced into child labor, begging etc., the mother is also not left out as she is also prone to sexual assault.26
where divorce leads to lack of proper moral up bring, there could be an increase in children with anti-social behaviors which thus increase the crime rate, since such children are likely to treat laws and morals with impunity and take crimes such as stealing, robbery, prostitution, financial crimes etc. as a lifestyle.27
Where a father fails to discharge his financial obligation towards his children, there will be a financial strain on the woman which makes her poor since she has to spend more without an increase in income. The children will not be exposed to much opportunities, since good living increases opportunities. For instance, an educated person who is also an artisan has more opportunities than a stack illiterate and an educated person who has no skill. Where such children are unable to complete their education, they will have to limit themselves to menial Job.28
However, the presented study revealed that personal characteristics and socio-cultural factors such as wrong selection, unmet emotional needs, interference of families, high connection to families are more important than traditional factors (sexual or physical). This study has one important message for policy makers in divorce and families that for consistency of life, couples need to realize each other in all aspect of life, and that the authorities must create such environment.29
Negative Impact of Divorce Among Muslim Couples
Noticeable Effect of Divorce on Spouses
It is observed that after the divorce many females indulge into prostitution hence they have no fended for themselves. These results to their violation of Islamic code of conduct and will become promiscuous beings. They become soft targets for all kinds of blames as they have no husband that can defend them, she is impregnated by a man that she is not married to; in most cases the parents would force her to abort the pregnancy so that they are not disgraced and intimidated in public. In some cases, the parent disowns her sometimes throughout her life. What happens next, she becomes a prostitute, aborting the pregnancy is termination of an innocent life on the other hand, failure to abort the pregnancy; she cannot cope with the burden of the child sustenance.30
The poor child if born becomes an outcast if he comes to the world; he suffers stigmatization from people because he has no father. The child grows up and faces humiliation of life. When every child normally has a father and mother in his own case he has only a mother. It will be difficult for a woman to cater for all the basic needs of the child single handedly. The mother who probably feels that she is frustrated and humiliated will as a result of this lack the zeal to give the child proper attention. The child will grow up demoralized. He suffers different types of deprivations including parental love, care and affection. Such children grow up humiliated and heartless. They resort to various crimes such as robbery, rope, arson and other related wrong doings.31
It is also observed that, divorce has a negative impact on man too, while a woman can gather her friends, cuss her partner to eternal damnation and cry her heart out, men cannot really make their feelings vocal. Men are emotionally introverts and tend to be suffering in silence. The inability to express grief and nursing a mortal blow to self-esteem can result in a gradual breakdown in their health. The stress involved in the divorce can cause lack of sleep, depression, fatigue and listlessness. These systems end up giving way to bigger afflictions. Sometimes, with the stress level surpassing it limits, it can end up causing cardiac arrest. Beside the physical, a divorce can have numerous psychological implications as well. Studies have shown that divorce men and woman have shown higher tendencies becoming juvenile psychopaths than the ones whose marriages do not end.32
Noticeable Effect of Divorce on Children
The negative effect of broken homes on children depends on many factors, the most important of which are the causes of the broken homes when it occurs, and it is either temporary or permanent. When there is a break in the home as a result of death and children realize that, the parent will never return, mourn the loss and transfer their affection to the remaining parent, hoping in this way to regain the security they formally had. By so doing one will find the children forget that they had other things to attend to like their academics and as students there is need for determination and commitment to the classroom activities, but a child who happens to have a parent pre occupied with grief and practical problems of a broken homes give rise to children that feel rebuffed and unwanted. This will however, result to resentment that can seriously cause damage or affect the child’s intellectual potentialities required from him or her as a student and that could deter his/her academic achievement in the classroom and elsewhere.33
It has been observed that the absence of one parent as a result of divorce makes impossible for a single parent to be an adequate role model, therefore a child who is not given parental love, guidance and personal affection often develops a problem that hinders his growth. Children from broken homes develop bitterness and hatred among themselves because of the foundation, which were laid by their parents. This may lead them to indulge in prostitution, armed robbery and other vices. Observation also showed that many delinquent acts could be traced to broken homes. Many types of deviant behaviors are linked to disruption of good moral upbringing from parents.34
Divorce could conflict frustration on children and render them useless in life. The result of this factor leads to children becoming nuisance to the society making their integrated into their community and the larger society very difficult.35
Some Solutions to the Problems of Divorce
Rate of divorce is on the rise in the Muslim community especially among the people that have well-grounded Islamic Education. To proceed, if a person wishes to worship Allah truly and properly, he must submit to Allah’s commands regardless of whether those commands are related to prayers, fasting or marriage or divorce. When a person is not equipped with authentic Islamic knowledge in choosing his or her desires and wishes over and above what Allah and Messenger (SAW). This inevitably leads to problems in many of the affairs of a person, especially in the cases of marital relationship. This study set to highlight measures
in which divorce can be prevented.36
Parents should not force their children in to marriage, arranged against their will. In Islam this is considered as oppression and abuse. Marriage in Islam requires ᾽Ijāb and Qubūl (proposal and acceptance) forcing woman to marry a man means that there was no Qubūl, this is the right of a woman, regardless of her age. She should have the right to make sure that the proposing man is a suitable match, worthy of her respect and love and capable of making her happy.37
Complete maintenance of wife is the husband is duty; she is entitled to that by virtue of marriage. If she happens to have any property before and after marriage the husband has no right whatsoever to any portion or share of his wife’s property. This restricts marriage to its noble purpose and disentangles it from all unworthy objective. Husband and wife should be faithful to each other. Marriage is the only relationship in which sexual relations are lawful in Islam. It is therefore very important that each person should try to satisfy the other so that none will tempted to look for sexual satisfaction outside marriage, and thereby commit Zina which is very serious offence.38
The marriage is extremely happier if the couple really agrees to be husband and wife. The tendency is also that, their children will be move cared for and move disciplined hence the husband and the wife voluntarily agrees to marry out of mutual love and understanding of each other.
This research work deals with the causes, effects and remedies of divorce on socio-economic development, this work consists of effect of divorce on spouses and children, the causes of divorce among married Muslim couples is includes compulsory marriage, unfaithfulness among married couples. In capacity of the husband to shoulder full responsibility of his wife, absent of sexual satisfaction by the husband as well as influence of parents in the lives of their children.
It is interesting to know that a man can either marry a women selected to him by his parents or the one he himself has selected. It is recommended that, men and women should be allowed to decide their faith by making their choice themselves. This gives more stability in the marriage than the situation where the parents do the selection for their sons or daughters even if it is your child who has to get married not you. Do not put your personal preference in the spouse’s selection but rather your child preferences.
Parents as well as individual looking for spouses must be honest with regards to their background and other details about their personal lives. They should be honest about their child achievements, strengths and weaknesses and allow both bride and groom to be, to communicate with honesty.
Based on this research, it was discovered that the root causes of divorce among the couples in Nigeria are incapacity of the husband to shoulder full responsibility of his wife, because some men when seeking the hand of woman in marriage they pretend a lot. They claim they own or can do what they know they are not capable of doing.
The women who are so much inclined to marrying only well to do individuals hardly investigate such claims and they proceed to the marriage. This brings mutual disrespect among the couples after marriage.
It is also observed that compulsory marriage in Nigeria is another factor which contributes to the high rate of divorce among married Muslim couples is because some parents used threats, emotional blackmail, greediness and bribes to force their daughters and arranges the marriage against her wishes. Some parents use the tactic of not speaking to their son or daughter for months at a time to convince them to get married to the person of parent’s choice. Other families threaten to disown the offspring if she or he does not accept the prospective spouses especially if is a coursing from the home land.
Based on the research findings the recommendations were made on various and stake holders in this respect.
1. ‛Ulama should preach and admonish people particularly couples on the consequences of divorce and the need for endurance and perseverance in the conduct marital life. They should teach people on the necessity of following the Sunnah of the Prophet (SAW) pertaining the conduct of marriage. They should also form a forum that will be enlightening the ᾽Ummah on the necessity of maintaining good martial ties in the community.
2. Marriages should be based on thorough investigations it should be fully investigated where the spouses come from that is their family background and their upbringing the discipline in the respective families before arranging marriages.
3.Muslim clerics have the duty of sensitizing the parents and the Muslim couples what Allah (SWT) said about marriages and divorce.
4. Marital ties should ultimately be based on mutual love, admirable behaviors of the spouses including their proper upbringing in their respective houses
5. To the Parents: Parents should know that their children have freedom of choice. They should be allowed to choose their spouses whom they will live together permanently; therefore, parents should not force their children to marry those they do not love. The ultimate result of divorce which may lead to some mischievous act such as prostitution and various forms of social vices are mostly caused by forced marriages.
6. To the Spouses: They should adopt Islamic values to be their way of life. This off-course spread love and compassion between them.
7. They should try hard to learn Islamic education in order to know their duties, responsibilities and right as couples. They should always pray to Allah (SWT) for the sustenance of their married life and bestow upon them the gift of pious children.
8. To the society: The Muslim society should discard all innovation introduced into the conduct of marriage especially those smuggled from the western world. The society should cast away all those traditions that may breed discord in marriage. They should also need to involve a formidable way of tackling the problem of marital discord based on the dictates of Shari’ah.
Notes and References
- Babalola, Ibrahim., “An examination of the effects of divorce and the Islamic legal framework for its prevention”, (Lagos-Nigeria: Legacy Press, 2004), p. 230
- Ibid p 232.
- Dan-Fulani Y., “Marriage and Divorce in Islam”, (Mina: Islamic Education Trust, 1989),
- Ibid p. 57
- Ibid p. 58
- Dan-Fulani Y., “Marriage and Divorce in Islam”, (Mina: Islamic Education Trust, 1989), Pp. 58-59
- Ibid p. 59
- Doi, Abdurrahman, “Sharia the Islamic Law”, (Zaria: Centre of Islamic Legal Studies, 1404 AH/1983), p. 125
- Ibid p. 127
- Ibid pp. 128-129
- Ibid Pp. 160-61
- Adamu, Al-Hassan, “Rate of Divorce Cases”, (Ibadan: Sakirabe Publishers, 2000), p. 29
- Ibid p. 30
- Ibid p. 30
- Adamu, Al-Hassan, “Rate of Divorce Cases”, (Ibadan: Sakirabe Publishers, 2000), p. 30
- Ibid p. 31-32
- Ibid p. 32
- Adamu, Al-Hassan., “Rate of Divorce Cases”, (Ibadan: Sakirabe Publishers, 2000), p. 32
- Amina, Elahi. “Marriage and Family Building”, (London: Ta-Ha Publishers Ltd, 2007),
- Ibid p. 80
- Ibid p. 81-82
- Ibid p. 82
- Abbas, Fahad, “Muslim Marital Homes”. The Nation, 5 September, 2011, www.tnn.ng, P. 16
- Abdul-Aziz, Zahruddeen, “Women’s Shield in Islam”, (Jos: Daruss-Saqafafi Arabia Bookshop, 2008), p. 239
- Abdulhamid, Muhammad, “The Effect of Broken Homes on Science Education Student” (Sokoto: Al Amin Publishers Ltd, 2011), p. 34
- Ibid p. 35
- Madelyn, Halorm, “Marriage and Family”, (Ikeja-Lagos: Eedmans Publishing Company, 2002), p. 445
- Ibid p. 445
- Nuhu, Ahmed, “High Divorce late in Nigeria”, (Ikorodu: Al-Tawheed Publishers, 2012), p. 78.
- Ibid p. 79
- Faisal, Salim, “The Concept of Divorce Under Muslim Laws”, (India: Islamic Book Service, 2012), p. 142
- Djauro Hamman, “Marriage and its Problems in Nigerians”, (Maiduguri: Yobe Printing Press, 2015) p. 80
- Ibid Pp. 80-81
- Basher, Saleh, “Divorce on the State of Sharia”, (Kaduna: Iqra Publishers, 2008), p. 50
- Ibid p. 51
- Ibid p. 51
- Ibrhaim, Tasieet-al, “The Reasons Behind High Rate of Divorce”, (Ibadan: Rasmed Publishers, 2008), p. 332
- Ibid Pp. 332-333
- Jibir, Yahya, “Fiqh of Marriage in Sharia”, (Kano: Triumph Publishing Company, 2002), p. 72